Going as a Great Wave of Cool Water*

A Ramblings post written by on March 30, 2014

Travels | Princess Tofu

Travels | Princess Tofu

Travels | Princess Tofu

I’ve been hugging the curves of route 1, clinging to their nauseating waves, swinging, rocking back between ocean and land. Those stretches of roads are glorious, as are the beaches that dot their curvatures. You can feel the ocean’s mass move away from you in tidal rhythms at the very edge. Stand long enough, and they will come back in a dangerous, foamy dance, crashing with each thunderous pursuit, fear incarnated in a cadence of rogue waves, danger thwarted by distance.

I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.

I do not think that they sing to me.

I have seen them riding seaward on the waves
Combing the white hair of the waves blown back
When the wind blows the water white and black.

We have lingered in the chambers of the sea
By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown
Till human voices wake us, and we drown.

 

from the love song of j alfred prufrock by  ts eliot

Travels | Princess Tofu

Travels | Princess Tofu

I love traveling, or, running away, if I was honest enough to call it by its name. It’s one of my best skills. And no, it’s never running towards anything, but always away – away from things that I hate, things that I love, things that cause too much pain or pleasure, things that cause excessive boredom or too much excitement, things that are unpredictable or repel comprehension, or just myself. I will run as far as I can, and here, I can’t really run anymore. I know if I continue past these shores, I will end up where I began, and that scares me a lot.

But I also know I won’t go into the water; I don’t swim, do not wish to learn. On the shore, I can keep my sharp edges, my knives and scissors and things for cutting. I use on them on my invisible strings or anything at all that ties. The water’s force and motion soften the edges of nearly everything they touch. Stay in long enough and it will turn you into roundish balls. Out there, it’s easy to let the water’s force form you, like they’ve been forming those rocks. Here, on the dry shore it’s safe with my knot-eliminating routine. There are many ways to tie a knot, and considerably less ways to cut them. I’ve still got knives.

 

Travels | Princess Tofu

Travels | Princess Tofu

Travels | Princess Tofu

 

Travels | Princess Tofu

 

So back and forth between the shores and my kitchen, I’ve found another escape. Sure, it’s a type of productivity – an edible thing that nourishes or heal. You can even call it essential, but I know it’s not. I can survive on less and be just as healthful with a less satisfying salve, but cooking is my time-eater, the slowest recipes are best, I can get lost in the steps, use them to forget, make things out of furry, and consume it out of the lack of power over the other things, life.  Nothing will make a pie faster than anxiety, I say, because I am quick to cook, slow to eat, and almost always always so hungry. So, in regards to why this cooking blog is here, I guess I would say it’s my daily tonic. I’m just glad I found it so soon.  It keeps me busy balancing knives.

Travels | Princess Tofu

Travels | Princess Tofu

 

Travels | Princess Tofu

* from Ezra Pound’s Commission

** All photos were taken at bowling ball beach & glass beach.





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8 Responses to “Going as a Great Wave of Cool Water*”

  1. These photos are superb! All those delicate colors, textures and that atmosphere.

    • phi says:

      ahhhh suvi, thank you so much.

      i mean, i should really say – i have this huge crush for you/your photos. love love love.

  2. You say it so beautifully and truthfully. My iPad cover says “Let’s Run Away.” My dreaming up of the where and the how usually exceeds the ability to go there, so I walk in the nearby hills as you walk on your local coasts. It quenches….. for the time being 😉

  3. This is so beautiful that I have nothing else to say.

  4. This is perfection.. The words, the poem, the pictures. The stormy sea. Perfection.

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